Things Teachers Are Amazing at That Have Nothing to Do with Teaching

October 13, 2017

Spend a few years in the classroom, and you'll inevitably get better at addressing a group . You'll start to grade papers faster and faster. Your lesson plans will begin to sparkle with wit and charm. Your ability to deliver information in a thoughtful and engaging manner may even begin to surprise you. Students will shower you with compliments...eh, probably not that. But time spent in the classroom is likely going to improve your skills as a teacher. However, there are a few things that every seasoned teacher has become a pro at that have exactly nothing to do with teaching.

1. Bladder Control - Never tell a teacher that they can’t go to the restroom. If they are asking to go, they have been holding since before that one kid started asking them about the assignment that is due next week, but they were really excited that the kid asked since that kid never gets excited about classwork and now they seem to be into it and was that the bell?

Related: 10 Things I Learned About Teachers Working at SchoolStatus

2. Eating Fast - You have tutoring today and the club you sponsor meets today too, but that person from the district office is here too. There is a “restaurant” in your workplace, but it’s not very good and you have to go down the hall to get to it which means you have to talk to Mr. Way-too-Happy. No kid has ever brought you an apple, but you do have a yogurt today and now you have just a few minutes to eat it… Oh, Hi District Office person…

3. Having a Real Job - How many times have you heard, “I don’t know how you do it, do you like it?” Maybe the proper response should be “How do you sit in one spot all day?” Or if we’re thinking profession specific jobs: Banker: “So you just count all day?” Lawyer: “So you argue all day? I know some eight year olds that do the same thing.”

4. Potty Training Other People’s Kids - Here is a sentence I have actually said in my career: “Come on man, you’re in high school…” I will leave you to fill in the blanks.

5. Next Level Time Management - Teachers might have one super power. They have the ablity to glance at a clock and in less than a second have this exact thought: “Ok, it’s 10:50 and class lets out at 11:03 (why would they make the class end at 11:03), so 13 minutes. Do I get them started on the next lesson or review? No, no time for either, but too much time to sit around. Ok, we’re going to read this poem.” “Ok, class, turn to page 432.” ::collective groan:: ::inward smile::

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Tyler Cummings is awesome: SchoolStatus trainer by day, crime fighter by night. Actually that's not true, he fights crime during the day, too. 

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